Elisabeth Hasselbeck Understands Black People

The View's Elisabeth Hasselbeck was recently regaling her co-hosts with an oh-so-amusing story of how, while out shopping with her young daughter Grace, she was getting funny looks from the evidently cloistered white people around her, because Grace was carrying the doll representing Sorry your feelings got hurt Elisabeth, but just imagine feeling the sting of discrimination over several generations, or the curious, sometimes awkward stares and comments not because your child is carrying a black doll, but has married interacially and is raising biracial children. Now that's a notion that'll probably make your dear friends lose their overpriced lunches. But carry, on, I feel your pain, no seriously, more than you know.

Tiger Woods: Zero for Par

Tiger Woods, Cablinasian golf hero, has been outed as a philandering husband. After his recent bizarre tree-hitting accident, rampant media speculation regarding his mysterious injuries forced him to admit that, yes, he cheated on his hot Swedish wife (ok, shallow I know, but Tiger, seriously??!) with some 20-something reality girl ( No judgement or anything). Anyhoo, rumor has it that Elin Nordegren, said hot Swedish wife (And mother of Tiger's so-cute children) got handy with a golf club, and inflicted aforementioned injuries. Anyhoo, after all this hoopla, Tiger still ain't talkin' and thus far has gotten away with a fine for reckless driving. Now that we've established that the Bill Cosby of sports is as flawed as any of the rest of us, we need to get back to matters of greater importance, what's Lindsay Lohan up to these days?

The Power-Packed Punch of Precious

Immediately after viewing the critically-acclaimed film "Precious", I texted my friend summarizing my impression of the movie. This was at 10:30 at night. On a Sunday. Such was the raw acting talent of Gabby Sidibe and the frightening transformation of Mo'Nique, that I was blasted out of my little existential bubble and into a bleak world, that, as the aforementioned friend pointed out, is a fact of life for too many, especially people of color. Despite some shortcomings (negative portrayal of black motherhood; lack of some back story on Precious' abusive and emotionally warped mother), this film goes beyond others of its genre in vividly presenting how a dark-skinned black teen in 80's Harlem uses immense fortitude to cope with being raised by one abusive parent while raising the children of the other abusive parent by whom she got pregnant. I applaud Precious for not coming across as an afterschool special, and despite its shortcomings, I'm rooting for it to be recognized in awards season, for it's a very good beginning in allowing art to bring more such stories to the forefront in an equally meaningful and honest fashion.

Sammy Sosa Embraces the (Not-So) Dark Side

Hello, again, my lovely loyal readers. I'm back to rant, and not at all in a kinder, gentler fashion. As you may well know, Sammy Sosa, while intending to soften his skin, ended up bleaching his face to match Edward Cullen's (Cool, a chance to throw in Twilight!) Now, anyone who's ever stood in a beauty supply store knows this explanation is crap. We've all seen the tubes of cream with names like "Fair and White", and "Black & White" (I wish I were making that name up) whose label descriptions barely mask their intentions to turn one from Oprah to Alicia Keyes, and probably lighter. I am deeply offended and hurt by these actions on so many levels. Firstly, Sammy evidently thinks his audience is stupid, seeing as he used the lamest excuse possible to justify why he looks like the undead. Secondly, as a public figure, he IS a role model, whether he cares to be or not, and by doing this, he's saying that brown-skinned people aren't good enough, as they are, lastly, Sammy's actions, because of their colonial implications, will perpetuate the long-standing animosity that darker-complexioned people harbor towards those with lighter skin or a biracial background, because of the real and perceived advantages they enjoy in this society. Enjoy your artificial complexion, Sammy,thanks for the disappointment.

Richard Nixon: Friend of the Mulatto

New tapes have recently been released of Richard Nixon's many delightful musings on the world, including his beliefs regarding abortion. Here for your reading pleasure is a quote from an article, in which he's speaking to special counsel Chuck Colson: Nixon said, "There are times when abortions are necessary, I know that, you know that's when you have a black and a white." Colson: "Or rape." Nixon: "Or rape." (Here's the link to the full article from which this came http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2009/06/23/eveningnews/main5107797.shtml). This quote seems to imply that the Prez thought that race-mixing was worse than rape, as it appears that he had to be prodded to include that aspect in his commentary. Wow.

Regarding Michael Jackson

While this blog was on hiatus, we lost a giant of the entertainment industry. It is well understood that Michael Jackson was, to say the least, a deeply troubled man. In his eternal quest to cling to a childhood he felt deprived of, he made many questionable judgements and it remains a matter of fierce debate as to whether he took his behavior to depraved levels. His face seemed to became a tableu for his monumental insecurities, and he developed a dependency on painkillers, enabled by those around him who did not neccesarily have his best interests in mind. Conversely, he was a family man who had a close relationship with his mother, maintained close friendships with a small circle of confidantes, and raised three children who, as was made clear during his memorial service, loved him deeply. Of course it goes without saying, he was an artistic genius whose unique style was well-regarded by greats like Fred Astaire and James Brown, as well as recognized the world over. As we the public remember Michael Jackson, we must keep in mind both his incomparable talent and the complicated human being behind the magic. Farewell, Gloved One. Thanks for being a part of the rhythm of our lives.

Back in the Saddle

Dear Readers:

A life transition temporarily interrupted publication of this blog, but I'm back and look forward to continuing to share insights on the mulatto experience. Thanks to those who've read up to this point, I appreciate it.